Your Guide to The New Gay Massage Therapist

The reputation of a gay massage therapist is very different than it was just a few years ago. With the newfound acceptance of the gay community increasing every day, many people are coming to the realization that these professionals are capable of providing a great service to a great many people. They give expert therapy to those who are in need of relief from stress, anxiety, sore muscles, overworked joints, and a frazzled mind. It is true that a majority of the clients of a gay masseuse are other gay males, but the number of straight males who are choosing to get their rubdowns from these masseurs is increasing dramatically, especially in the bigger cities.

More straight males are finding that a gay massage can really provide services that are fulfilling therapy wise without any trace of eroticism whatsoever. With the rise of the metrosexual male comes a huge increase in the business that many of these professionals are getting. A metrosexual male is described as a straight man who really grooms himself very well, most often way more than the average male would by getting manicures and pedicures, for example. These guys are as straight as they come, but are finding that the benefits of many services are well worth the time and money. Part of the group of services that fit right in with the metrosexual is a session with a male masseur. The most common reason that is given as to why straight men would see this type of professional as opposed to a female was simple: because men have stronger hands and can dig into those knots and sore muscles much deeper and better than a womans more petite hands can.

The services from a gay masseur are just as emotionally and physically satisfying as one from a female for these guys, but in addition to that satisfaction is also a sense of comeradery that is shared between males. Guys can talk it up with their buddies just as well as women can with their girlfriends, and getting a rubdown from a gay masseuses offers opportunities to relax and unwind with one of the guys. For the guys who are gay, getting massage services is considered the ultimate experience for them, whether the point of services is therapeutic, emotional, physical, platonic, or even if it is sexual.

Benefits Of Going To A Gay Massage Therapist

Even though there are some people who are uncomfortable with receiving a rubdown from a gay massage therapist, it is easy to understand why so many people are completely relaxed with it. In fact, there are plenty of men (gay or straight) who prefer going to a male masseur, whether the masseur is straight or not. Many men seem to worry that they might become sexually aroused during a session that is supposed to be physically beneficial if they receive one from a woman, and they don t want to deal with an embarrassing unwanted erection. It is for this reason that many men prefer to go to a professional fellow man.

Now, some straight men may be uncomfortable going to a gay massage therapist, but at the same token many gay men may be uncomfortable getting a massage from a straight masseur. Many gay men turn to the masseurs that are also homosexual, but they can be difficult to find since many massage parlors do not want to deter either straight or homosexual clients by catering to one or the other.

However, the benefits are worth doing a little detective work to find a place that they are comfortable with. For those who are straight, they can enjoy a rubdown without the stress of worrying about sexual contact. It is thought that when a straight man can get a good massage from another man it reduces feelings of insecurity and it can also increase self esteem. There seems to be some psychological benefits to a good physical rubdown!

Going to a gay massage therapist has its benefits to a gay man too, because the element or fear of feeling ostracized or out of place disappears. The entire point of a massage is to completely relax, but this is very hard to do when you don t feel like you fit in with the rest of the clientele at a place or even with the staff, for that matter. Knowing that you have nothing to fear with your specific masseur can really alleviate anxiety.

It is recommended that every man, no matter what his sexual orientation is, be able to experience the satisfaction of receiving a therapeutic rubdown from a straight or gay massage therapist in a non judgmental and socially positive atmosphere. Whether that means having a gay or straight man giving the massage, the choice should be up to the client. Thankfully these days there are many excellent resources on the Internet for finding a masseuse in your area that will be able to cater to any and all of your needs with many different types of therapies and techniques, whether you choose a straight or a gay massage therapist.

“Celebrate Sex”- a San Diego workshop for Gay/Bisexual/Transgender Men

Dear Colleagues:

 

On Saturday, December 6th, from 1:00PM to 2:30PM, I am offering the “Celebrate Sex” workshop at the LGBT Center in San Diego.  Reservations are requested and there is no charge for the workshop.  This interactive, playful and humor-filled workshop is limited to 40 gay, bisexual or transgendered men (ages 18 and older).  Feel free to share this email with your clients and if you – or they – have any questions, drop me a line at beyondtherapy@cox.net or call me at 619-955-3311.  Here is an excerpt from my September 2008 article (from San Diego’s The Bottom Line magazine) that inspired the San Diego LGBT Center to ask me to create this workshop. 

 

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

 

Sincerely,

Michael

As gay/bisexual/transgender (GBT) men, having a healthy sex life is a BIG part of our life.  Lately – in case you’ve been living in a cave – it’s all too easy to focus on what we’re doing WRONG sexually.  There are so many articles about barebacking, AIDS/HIV, STDs, impersonal hookups, sex addiction, how Adam4Adam and Manhunt are “destroying” gay life…you know.  How often do we focus on what’s RIGHT with our sexual lives?  How often do we let ourselves CELEBRATE sex and how much we enjoy it?  Do we have to make sex “the enermy”?  Can’t sex be something to celebrate?  I say “yes!”   To do this, it helps to let go of our old, negative ideas about sex. 

 

As GBT men – regardless of our age – most of us have a lot of shame and embarrassment about our sexual histories and fantasies

 

 

Most of us get our fundamental ideas about sex from our childhood.  Ask yourself:

 

What are my family beliefs about sex?

How have these beliefs helped me?

How have they held me back?

 

Take a look at your current sexual life.  Ask yourself:

 

What do I have to celebrate about sex?

What are some of the most wonderful sexual experiences I’ve had?

How have these experiences changed me?

 

Are there any obstacles you have to celebrating your sexual self?  Consider:

 

What stands in my way of enjoying a terrific sex life?

Am I holding onto any old ideas that hold me back sexually?

Do I have any physical challenges that hold me back sexually?

 

Celebrating your sexual fantasies:  can you enjoy them without all that old 20^th century guilt and shame? 

 

Do I let myself have sexual fantasties?  If so, do enjoy them?

What are some of my fantasies about sex?

Have I ever fulfilled a sexual fantasy?  When and how?

Are there any sexual fantasies that I would really like to experience?  If so, how could I make them a reality? 

 

Celebrating a well-balanced sexual life: A well-balanced sexual life involves our head and heart, not just our genitals. 

 

What role does your head (thinking) play in your sexual life?  Do you want it to be more or less involved?

What role does your heart (feeling) play in your sexual life? Do you want it to be more or less involved?

What role do your genitals (libido) play in your sexual life?  Do you want them to be more or less involved?

How can you balance your head, heart and genitals to make your sexual life really alive?

 

A happy and healthy sex life is a major part of our mental and physical health.  If we are willing to see our sexual expression as a wonderful and essential part of who we are, we have the capacity to be mentally and physically healthier than ever before.  So, let’s stop focusing on what’s wrong with our sexual lives and – instead – let ourselves CELEBRATE sex.  .